To sin in Anger

So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.  James 1:19-20

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  Proverbs 15:1

As He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct.  1 Peter 1:15

I have to say upfront.......meekness doesn't come easily for me.  As a natural redhead (with a little grey mixed in) my temper is pretty quick.  Add in a little hormone and you have the recipe for a strong tongue lashing and maybe a slammed door or two.  When I was younger it took a lot for me to lose my temper.  Now days I seem to be living on the edge of losing it all the time.  And after the storm blows over I feel so low down and dirty that it breaks my heart.  What's even worse is that the very two who get caught in the storm are the very two I would give my life to protect and would dare any one to mess with them.  I've often wondered if aliens haven't done some body snatching here and there.....lol.  As much as I would like to, I can't blame my bad behavior on aliens.  I can't blame it on the ones who think differently than I do.  I have to blame it on ......me.  But my anger, as in the above scripture, isn't who I am in the great I AM (God and Jesus).  The fruit of the spirit produces love, patience and kindness.  It is easy to be kind when things go my way.  It is easy to love when things go my way.  And it is easy to be patient when things are going well.  It isn't so easy to do those three things when life throws you a curve ball.  Or when your body isn't sure if it is young or old (the transition period of hitting the latter 40s).  It isn't easy when you want to comfort or help someone who doesn't want you to help them. 

I try to do everything right and often times I expect those around me to get it right the first time as well.  But the Good Lord has shown me here recently that I'm not perfect.  What?  And I shouldn't expect that of others.  He is teaching me that there are two natures on the inside and they are at war constantly.  Sadly, guess which one I let win?  I have been trying to make a conscious effort to pray in particular about my temper before I even get out of bed each morning.  I want others to see Jesus in me.  I want to be a sweet fragrance to my Lord.  I once heard a preacher tell this story:

     There was an old preacher telling about the two natures in man.  He described it  as having two dogs, one was good and true, the other was mean and sneaky.  These two dogs would often and furiously fight.  He was asked which dog would win.  He said the one I say attack to.

Which one of your dogs will win today?  Just remember, even if the mean one wins this battle, it hasn't won the war.  God forgives and is very generous with His mercy and grace.  Pray and believe and He can help you as He is helping me every minute of every day.